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invisible loss

stillbith, prenatal bereavement, my labor story, our invisible loss, stillbirth survivor, motherhood, the mommy codes, motherhood, julie barzman
08 Oct 2021
Mom Life, Pregnancy

Stillbirth & Pregnancy Loss – My Labor Story

  STILLBIRTH - IS NOT A TOPIC I EVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE WRITING ABOUT. I predicted taking you along right until the end of my pregnancy, introducing you to a new little person and telling you everything about my labor story - my foreseeable and predictable ups-and-downs of a mother of two. With a heavy heart, I am not telling you the story I so ho[...]

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Hi, I’m Julie.

Hi, I’m Julie.

I'm living my most authentic life as a mom, as a partner, as a multi-cultural learner, and sharing every moment with you along the way.

I’m joining you from

I’m joining you from

Los Angeles, United States

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My hope is that they remember I tried. Even when I was tired, even when I was stressed. I hope that they know I did it all for them. That I had every intention of being great, good, and grand, but some days all I could be was okay. ⁠ ⁠ I hope they know that I still showed up. That I still tried. That every day I tried to be better, because of them. ⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport
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My hope is that they remember I tried. Even when I was tired, even when I was stressed. I hope that they know I did it all for them. That I had every intention of being great, good, and grand, but some days all I could be was okay. ⁠
⁠
I hope they know that I still showed up. That I still tried. That every day I tried to be better, because of them. ⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport

2 days ago
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1/4
Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. ⁠ ⁠ I’ve always paid attention to this day and sent a lot of love to parents that are mourning their babies. ⁠ ⁠ This time, I’m sending love but I’m also grieving my losses. 💔⁠ ⁠ I am 1 in 160 pregnancies that end in a stillbirth and I am also sadly, 1 in 4 ending in an early miscarriage in June. ⁠ ⁠ I am hoping that through social media and being able to connect with all of you, we find it in ourselves to heal, to support one another whether we’ve been through a loss or a friend, or a loved one experiencing it. ⁠ ⁠ I was thinking about how difficult it was for my mom to survive my brother’s death. There wasn’t social media, there wasn’t this tool to connect, to share, to confide, to feel understood… I have found unbelievable relief and warmth during difficult times thanks to this community. ⁠ ⁠ I pray for any of you today if you are grieving, if you are holding and supporting someone close to you belonging to these statistics. ⁠ ⁠ We are all healing one another little by little through our voices and simply saying "You’re not alone." And today, we deeply think of all the angel babies that are gone too soon. ⁠ ⁠ I am loving you Blake Moon every day and honoring you.❤️⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. ⁠
⁠
I’ve always paid attention to this day and sent a lot of love to parents that are mourning their babies. ⁠
⁠
This time, I’m sending love but I’m also grieving my losses. 💔⁠
⁠
I am 1 in 160 pregnancies that end in a stillbirth and I am also sadly, 1 in 4 ending in an early miscarriage in June. ⁠
⁠
I am hoping that through social media and being able to connect with all of you, we find it in ourselves to heal, to support one another whether we’ve been through a loss or a friend, or a loved one experiencing it. ⁠
⁠
I was thinking about how difficult it was for my mom to survive my brother’s death. There wasn’t social media, there wasn’t this tool to connect, to share, to confide, to feel understood… I have found unbelievable relief and warmth during difficult times thanks to this community. ⁠
⁠
I pray for any of you today if you are grieving, if you are holding and supporting someone close to you belonging to these statistics. ⁠
⁠
We are all healing one another little by little through our voices and simply saying "You’re not alone." And today, we deeply think of all the angel babies that are gone too soon. ⁠
⁠
I am loving you Blake Moon every day and honoring you.❤️⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport

3 days ago
View on Instagram |
2/4
Thank you for all of your kind words, your messages, your comments, your shares, and your love. It means so much to me that over 1,500 pairs of eyes have read my heartbreaking story.⁠ ⁠ My hope is that my words, my experience, my tragic story will be another family's light in the darkness. ⁠ ⁠ Thank you from Kyle, Oliver, and I. Here is a photo of us when our smiles were a little bit wider. 🙏🏼💞⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

Thank you for all of your kind words, your messages, your comments, your shares, and your love. It means so much to me that over 1,500 pairs of eyes have read my heartbreaking story.⁠
⁠
My hope is that my words, my experience, my tragic story will be another family's light in the darkness. ⁠
⁠
Thank you from Kyle, Oliver, and I. Here is a photo of us when our smiles were a little bit wider. 🙏🏼💞⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport

6 days ago
View on Instagram |
3/4
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
My labor story. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio.
⁠⁠
"There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠
⁠⁠
The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month… A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠

1 week ago
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4/4

Recent Posts

  • stillbith, prenatal bereavement, my labor story, our invisible loss, stillbirth survivor, motherhood, the mommy codes, motherhood, julie barzman

    Stillbirth & Pregnancy Loss – My Labor Story

    October 8, 2021
  • Julie Barzman, Lifestyle Blog, About The Mommy Codes, Contact The Mommy Codes, Affiliate Links, Candid Motherhood, Mom Blogger, Motherhood Blog, Mom Blogger Los Angeles, Los Angeles Mom Los Angeles Mom Blog, Los Angeles Mom Blogger, Motherhood Coaching Coaching LA Motherhood Coaching, Moms Blog, LA Mom Blog, Mommy Blogger, Mom Life, Parenting, Parenting Tips, Los Angeles Parents

    TALKING ABOUT PERINATAL BEREAVEMENT

    August 15, 2021
  • Julie Barzman, Lifestyle Blog, About The Mommy Codes, Contact The Mommy Codes, Affiliate Links, Candid Motherhood, Mom Blogger, Motherhood Blog, Mom Blogger Los Angeles, Los Angeles Mom Los Angeles Mom Blog, Los Angeles Mom Blogger, Motherhood Coaching Coaching LA Motherhood Coaching, Moms Blog, LA Mom Blog, Mommy Blogger, Mom Life, Parenting, Parenting Tips, Los Angeles Parents

    What Would I Do Differently

    August 4, 2021

Find the Mommy Codes on Instagram @juliebarzman

My hope is that they remember I tried. Even when I was tired, even when I was stressed. I hope that they know I did it all for them. That I had every intention of being great, good, and grand, but some days all I could be was okay. ⁠ ⁠ I hope they know that I still showed up. That I still tried. That every day I tried to be better, because of them. ⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

My hope is that they remember I tried. Even when I was tired, even when I was stressed. I hope that they know I did it all for them. That I had every intention of being great, good, and grand, but some days all I could be was okay. ⁠
⁠
I hope they know that I still showed up. That I still tried. That every day I tried to be better, because of them. ⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport

2 days ago
View on Instagram |
1/5
Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. ⁠ ⁠ I’ve always paid attention to this day and sent a lot of love to parents that are mourning their babies. ⁠ ⁠ This time, I’m sending love but I’m also grieving my losses. 💔⁠ ⁠ I am 1 in 160 pregnancies that end in a stillbirth and I am also sadly, 1 in 4 ending in an early miscarriage in June. ⁠ ⁠ I am hoping that through social media and being able to connect with all of you, we find it in ourselves to heal, to support one another whether we’ve been through a loss or a friend, or a loved one experiencing it. ⁠ ⁠ I was thinking about how difficult it was for my mom to survive my brother’s death. There wasn’t social media, there wasn’t this tool to connect, to share, to confide, to feel understood… I have found unbelievable relief and warmth during difficult times thanks to this community. ⁠ ⁠ I pray for any of you today if you are grieving, if you are holding and supporting someone close to you belonging to these statistics. ⁠ ⁠ We are all healing one another little by little through our voices and simply saying "You’re not alone." And today, we deeply think of all the angel babies that are gone too soon. ⁠ ⁠ I am loving you Blake Moon every day and honoring you.❤️⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. ⁠
⁠
I’ve always paid attention to this day and sent a lot of love to parents that are mourning their babies. ⁠
⁠
This time, I’m sending love but I’m also grieving my losses. 💔⁠
⁠
I am 1 in 160 pregnancies that end in a stillbirth and I am also sadly, 1 in 4 ending in an early miscarriage in June. ⁠
⁠
I am hoping that through social media and being able to connect with all of you, we find it in ourselves to heal, to support one another whether we’ve been through a loss or a friend, or a loved one experiencing it. ⁠
⁠
I was thinking about how difficult it was for my mom to survive my brother’s death. There wasn’t social media, there wasn’t this tool to connect, to share, to confide, to feel understood… I have found unbelievable relief and warmth during difficult times thanks to this community. ⁠
⁠
I pray for any of you today if you are grieving, if you are holding and supporting someone close to you belonging to these statistics. ⁠
⁠
We are all healing one another little by little through our voices and simply saying "You’re not alone." And today, we deeply think of all the angel babies that are gone too soon. ⁠
⁠
I am loving you Blake Moon every day and honoring you.❤️⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport

3 days ago
View on Instagram |
2/5
Thank you for all of your kind words, your messages, your comments, your shares, and your love. It means so much to me that over 1,500 pairs of eyes have read my heartbreaking story.⁠ ⁠ My hope is that my words, my experience, my tragic story will be another family's light in the darkness. ⁠ ⁠ Thank you from Kyle, Oliver, and I. Here is a photo of us when our smiles were a little bit wider. 🙏🏼💞⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

Thank you for all of your kind words, your messages, your comments, your shares, and your love. It means so much to me that over 1,500 pairs of eyes have read my heartbreaking story.⁠
⁠
My hope is that my words, my experience, my tragic story will be another family's light in the darkness. ⁠
⁠
Thank you from Kyle, Oliver, and I. Here is a photo of us when our smiles were a little bit wider. 🙏🏼💞⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #ourinvisibleloss #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport

6 days ago
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3/5
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ My labor story. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio. ⁠⁠ "There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
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⁠TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
My labor story. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for. I am a soul having a human experience, and one of those experiences is grieving for my sweet baby, Blake Moon. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
Here is an excerpt from my story, now available on themommycodes.com and link in bio.
⁠⁠
"There’s nothing we could’ve done. It was nothing I did. It wasn’t for any reason, it wasn’t meant to be. I didn’t need this experience to make me stronger, I don’t need to think of something worse to make this more tolerable, I don’t need to band-aid this loss by thinking of other babies I’ll maybe have one day. It is not casual, it is not “just a baby,” it is not just a loss for a month and then move on."⁠⁠
⁠⁠
The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month… A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
It breaks my heart to share my story with you. The grief and longing I feel for Blake Moon is overwhelming. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
When I first heard of Poppy Seed Health, it was months later after losing Blake. I didn’t know that 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy loss. I was blissfully unaware that 1 in 160 pregnancies end in stillbirth. I didn’t know there are resources like Poppy Seed Health to support my family and I in radical empathy. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
Within a few clicks of using Poppy Seed Health, I can have a 1:1 conversation with a doula, midwife or nurse. Having that instantaneous access would have helped me as I navigated Google, I could ask all the questions that I wanted. I can show up in this space and chat about how I’m feeling and what I’m going through. One thing that I’ve learned through this unexpected journey, is that I am not alone. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
If you have experienced a stillbirth or other pregnancy loss, my heart aches for you. Know that you are absolutely not alone. There is no right or wrong way to navigate a loss so deep. You are welcome to use my code JULIEB for a free month’s subscription to the Poppyseed Health app. ⁠⁠

1 week ago
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4/5
TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠ ⁠ The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month... A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠ ⁠ As a mother and a writer of my personal motherhood journey, I predicted taking you along right until the end of my pregnancy with Blake. I imagined introducing you to a new little person and telling you everything about my labor story – my foreseeable and predictable ups and downs of a mother of two. ⁠ ⁠ It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for, and sadly, I never guessed that I would be writing about my stillbirth, the unpredictable side of pregnancy. That never, ever even crossed my mind.⁠ ⁠ On Friday morning, I will be sharing my labor story about sweet baby Blake, and how this affected Kyle, Oliver and I. ⁠ ⁠ Thank you for being here, for reading along, for reaching out, and for sharing your hearts so openly with me. We need to share more about these unimaginable experiences. We need to normalize this for all parents, and remind each other, that you are not alone. ⁠ ⁠ This is motherhood. ⁠ ⁠ #neverbestill #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #infantloss #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport #infantlosssurvivor #infantlossjourney #infantlossadvocate #thisismotherhood
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow

TW: Stillbirth, pregnancy loss, trauma ⁠
⁠
The beginning of October marks the start of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month… A campaign that I once never would have thought being a part of. ⁠
⁠
As a mother and a writer of my personal motherhood journey, I predicted taking you along right until the end of my pregnancy with Blake. I imagined introducing you to a new little person and telling you everything about my labor story – my foreseeable and predictable ups and downs of a mother of two. ⁠
⁠
It breaks my heart that I am not telling you the story I hoped for, and sadly, I never guessed that I would be writing about my stillbirth, the unpredictable side of pregnancy. That never, ever even crossed my mind.⁠
⁠
On Friday morning, I will be sharing my labor story about sweet baby Blake, and how this affected Kyle, Oliver and I. ⁠
⁠
Thank you for being here, for reading along, for reaching out, and for sharing your hearts so openly with me. We need to share more about these unimaginable experiences. We need to normalize this for all parents, and remind each other, that you are not alone. ⁠
⁠
This is motherhood. ⁠
⁠
#neverbestill #stillbirthsurvivor #stillbirthbreakthesilence #stilbirthawareness #bloggersofinstagram #infantloss #pregnancyloss #infantlossawareness #infantlosssupport #infantlosssurvivor #infantlossjourney #infantlossadvocate #thisismotherhood

2 weeks ago
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5/5
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