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Julie Barzman, Lifestyle Blog, About The Mommy Codes, Contact The Mommy Codes, Affiliate Links, Candid Motherhood, Mom Blogger, Motherhood Blog, Mom Blogger Los Angeles, Los Angeles Mom Los Angeles Mom Blog, Los Angeles Mom Blogger, Motherhood Coaching Coaching LA Motherhood Coaching, Moms Blog, LA Mom Blog, Mommy Blogger, Mom Life, Parenting, Parenting Tips, Los Angeles Parents
Lifestyle Codes, Mommy Codes, Pregnancy Codes

WHAT I THOUGHT ABOUT CHILDBIRTH BEFORE GIVING BIRTH

I remember the day I found out I was pregnant, one of the first things that crossed my mind was “Oh my god! I’m going to have to give birth.”

Giving birth was honestly quite terrifying to think about but I always knew I wanted to become a mom…So I kinda had to deal with it! I remember on my way to buy my second pregnancy test, because I HAD to be sure this wasn’t just an AH-HA moment, I said to myself, “Julie, put these thoughts in a box and come back to it later.” I’m huge on compartmentalizing…which has its benefits…sometimes! It was just too much to think about…within my pregnancy, I naturally found the right time to start digging into it.

GIVING BIRTH WAS LIKE THIS MYSTERIOUS THING WOMEN DO.

Actually, millions of women have done it for years and years and yet I still felt like I was perhaps an exception. I kept hearing women say, “you’ll know exactly what to do.” But how? I pictured childbirth as something enigmatic that my subconscious and body apparently knew about – but “I” was left in the dark. So when they talk about a relationship with trust, this is the ultimate trust that I had to cultivate for 9 months between my body and me.

I just kept thinking that there was something growing inside of me and was somehow going to have to come out! I mean…it’s scary! Think about it! I was growing a freaking human!!!! Still to this day it absolutely boggles my mind that women are capable of such miracles! Exactly, CAPABLE, so I was going to give birth like a champ and everything was going to be fine!!! I decided it was time to put on my big girl pants (Kyle says that I live in some kind of world with unicorns and rainbows…I mean, maybe…) I guess, I told my unicorns to sit down for a minute. Like a hot minute.

I have always had huge respect for women, always loved empowered women sharing their stories and being themselves and now I LOVED moms! they were superheroes! I wanted…No sorry, I needed to know their secrets for giving birth! I mean I was low key about it because otherwise I would’ve been a complete freak with all the questions I had…So here’s some of the best advice I received after questioning moms for hours:

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

You can’t go into a situation that your body has prepared all your life for without BELIEVING that you can do it! You have to TRUST your body like I was saying above. I realized that my body had its own intelligence. It knew exactly what to do, from pregnancy to breastfeeding. I’ve actually never felt so not-in-control because my body was mechanically doing what needed to be done. I had no say. It was just happening. Let it be to its finest! It’s mind-blowing and that’s something to really hold onto while giving birth and surrender into knowing your body is guiding you. At some point, I was dilating real slow and I just said, I trust my body. Kid you not, I went from 3cm to 10cm in a few hours while they were saying it’d take hours…no! Let my body do what it’s supposed to do – of course, I wasn’t completely opposed to a little push but I had to give my body and Oliver a chance.

FEELING EMPOWERED

I didn’t expect towards the end of my pregnancy to get this urge of readiness. This trust. This “let’s do this” attitude. I had done my homework by getting advice from women around me who had done it, read a couple of books and attended birthing class. I might put thoughts in boxes sometimes, but I do like to be educated and feel prepared. Although, some will say too much information is literally too much information, which I have to agree with. At some point, I felt like I knew enough so it was time to just appreciate the feeling of empowerment! That feeling was also not a coincidence as I was R-E-A-D-Y for my little pancake to come out!!! Phew! It’s funny how being pushed to certain extremes, how it changes your mindset: I was terrified at first of the thought of giving birth and then I was terrified at the thought of NOT giving birth! Tick tock buddy! Let’s go!

VISUALIZATION & MEDITATION

These two are no joke! I think it’s amazing that we are more & more advancing in a world where meditation and visualizing are a thing. Honestly, nowadays, it’s what keeps me grounded. But most importantly, it’s advice I kept receiving; to sit and visualize your perfect birth. To talk to your baby and say “we are going to do this together.” It took me a minute but when I’d take a bath, I would talk to Oliver and express my excitement, my love and worries. I cherished that we were a team!

PICK YOUR SOURCE OF INFORMATION

It’s very tempting to read about horror stories…they happen…things happen, but there’s no need to lose yourself and your good vibes into thinking everything will go horribly because of what you read on Facebook and other platforms! This is something I didn’t follow enough and spooked myself more than once! Even now, I avoid reading horrifying stories about babies…like there’s a difference between being aware of certain risks and just being pushed into being scared for life, because of 1 in 1000000 chances for something bad to happen. I chose to stay on the positive side and have faith. It’s not a fair existence to live in constant fear and boy, do people love scaring the crap out of you!

This advice may seem super impersonal but that’s because birth is impersonal. Your birth story is unique. Components of your story are similar since the beginning of time but you can’t compare yourself. I felt guided but not as much as I wanted to, and no one can fill that blank…the unknown is that missing piece and acceptance is key. So these few things helped me tremendously to overcome fears I had about childbirth. If you want to read about my labor story, click here!

I hope that this helps!

Julie Barzman, Lifestyle Blog, About The Mommy Codes, Contact The Mommy Codes, Affiliate Links, Candid Motherhood, Mom Blogger, Motherhood Blog, Mom Blogger Los Angeles, Los Angeles Mom Los Angeles Mom Blog, Los Angeles Mom Blogger, Motherhood Coaching Coaching LA Motherhood Coaching, Moms Blog, LA Mom Blog, Mommy Blogger, Mom Life, Parenting, Parenting Tips, Los Angeles Parents

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Here are three things I wish someone told me to prepare before coming home from the hospital with my newborn. I learned this all through lived experiences. ⁠
⁠
👉🏼 Set up a postpartum shelf on wheels with all my healing needs- most is provided by the hospital. Having everything on deck and reachable when needed, especially during exhausting times is very helpful.⁠
⁠
👉🏼 If breastfeeding, the first thing I did is contact a lactation consultant. Every breastfeeding journey is different with each baby and sometimes can be too daunting with do’s and don’t. This gave me direction and a following game plan.⁠
⁠
👉🏼 Take really good care of my nipples and have prepped meals- healthy meals that I froze prior and coconut oil for nipples and nipple shield cups were everything while my skin got used to feeding.
⁠
Do you have anything to add to this list?⁠
⁠
#postpartum #newborn #postpartummom #candidmotherhood⁠
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow
Here are three things I wish someone told me to prepare before coming home from the hospital with my newborn. I learned this all through lived experiences. ⁠ ⁠ 👉🏼 Set up a postpartum shelf on wheels with all my healing needs- most is provided by the hospital. Having everything on deck and reachable when needed, especially during exhausting times is very helpful.⁠ ⁠ 👉🏼 If breastfeeding, the first thing I did is contact a lactation consultant. Every breastfeeding journey is different with each baby and sometimes can be too daunting with do’s and don’t. This gave me direction and a following game plan.⁠ ⁠ 👉🏼 Take really good care of my nipples and have prepped meals- healthy meals that I froze prior and coconut oil for nipples and nipple shield cups were everything while my skin got used to feeding. ⁠ Do you have anything to add to this list?⁠ ⁠ #postpartum #newborn #postpartummom #candidmotherhood⁠
11 hours ago
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My little bird 🥰⁠
⁠
#mommaoftwo #candidmotherhood #themommycodes #losangelesblogger #postpartumjourney
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
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My little bird 🥰⁠ ⁠ #mommaoftwo #candidmotherhood #themommycodes #losangelesblogger #postpartumjourney
3 days ago
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I can't look at my rainbow baby ⁠
without thinking of my angel baby. ⁠
⁠
I can't think of my angel baby⁠
without thanking for our rainbow baby. ⁠
⁠
There isn't a world or heaven where a child is replaceable. 💔⁠
⁠
The more I care for Zoë, the more my heart breaks for what happened to my little Blake. Grief of a child is the most awful thing I’ve ever had to go through and that has forever changed me. Holding him, kissing his little nose, birthing him for hours and having to let him go is my biggest heartbreak that keeps on hurting. 

While I get to hold my beautiful rainbow baby, my beautiful miracle, while I observe all of her…her eyes, her nose, life through her expressions and smile…I take it all in but my heart and body can constantly feel the hole of these moments that I’ll never get to have with him. 

To anyone who’s survived such a devastating loss…my heart knows how you feel at night when you close your eyes. My arms are wrapped around you. 

#postpartum #rainbowbaby #themommycodes #grief #letstalkaboutgrief
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
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I can't look at my rainbow baby ⁠ without thinking of my angel baby. ⁠ ⁠ I can't think of my angel baby⁠ without thanking for our rainbow baby. ⁠ ⁠ There isn't a world or heaven where a child is replaceable. 💔⁠ ⁠ The more I care for Zoë, the more my heart breaks for what happened to my little Blake. Grief of a child is the most awful thing I’ve ever had to go through and that has forever changed me. Holding him, kissing his little nose, birthing him for hours and having to let him go is my biggest heartbreak that keeps on hurting. While I get to hold my beautiful rainbow baby, my beautiful miracle, while I observe all of her…her eyes, her nose, life through her expressions and smile…I take it all in but my heart and body can constantly feel the hole of these moments that I’ll never get to have with him. To anyone who’s survived such a devastating loss…my heart knows how you feel at night when you close your eyes. My arms are wrapped around you. #postpartum #rainbowbaby #themommycodes #grief #letstalkaboutgrief
1 week ago
View on Instagram |
3/4
Hello friends! I'm Julie from The Mommy Codes. I introduce “mom life” codes throughout pregnancy and motherhood with a mission to bring more postpartum support, gentle parenting, traveling with children and exploring topics in a multi-cultural way and judgement free to help navigate motherhood as authentically as possible. ⁠
⁠
Thank you for being here and following along on this journey. 🥰⁠
⁠
#themommycodes #candidmotherhood #postpartumjourney #postpartumhealth
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow
Hello friends! I'm Julie from The Mommy Codes. I introduce “mom life” codes throughout pregnancy and motherhood with a mission to bring more postpartum support, gentle parenting, traveling with children and exploring topics in a multi-cultural way and judgement free to help navigate motherhood as authentically as possible. ⁠ ⁠ Thank you for being here and following along on this journey. 🥰⁠ ⁠ #themommycodes #candidmotherhood #postpartumjourney #postpartumhealth
2 weeks ago
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Here are three things I wish someone told me to prepare before coming home from the hospital with my newborn. I learned this all through lived experiences. ⁠
⁠
👉🏼 Set up a postpartum shelf on wheels with all my healing needs- most is provided by the hospital. Having everything on deck and reachable when needed, especially during exhausting times is very helpful.⁠
⁠
👉🏼 If breastfeeding, the first thing I did is contact a lactation consultant. Every breastfeeding journey is different with each baby and sometimes can be too daunting with do’s and don’t. This gave me direction and a following game plan.⁠
⁠
👉🏼 Take really good care of my nipples and have prepped meals- healthy meals that I froze prior and coconut oil for nipples and nipple shield cups were everything while my skin got used to feeding.
⁠
Do you have anything to add to this list?⁠
⁠
#postpartum #newborn #postpartummom #candidmotherhood⁠
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow
Here are three things I wish someone told me to prepare before coming home from the hospital with my newborn. I learned this all through lived experiences. ⁠ ⁠ 👉🏼 Set up a postpartum shelf on wheels with all my healing needs- most is provided by the hospital. Having everything on deck and reachable when needed, especially during exhausting times is very helpful.⁠ ⁠ 👉🏼 If breastfeeding, the first thing I did is contact a lactation consultant. Every breastfeeding journey is different with each baby and sometimes can be too daunting with do’s and don’t. This gave me direction and a following game plan.⁠ ⁠ 👉🏼 Take really good care of my nipples and have prepped meals- healthy meals that I froze prior and coconut oil for nipples and nipple shield cups were everything while my skin got used to feeding. ⁠ Do you have anything to add to this list?⁠ ⁠ #postpartum #newborn #postpartummom #candidmotherhood⁠
11 hours ago
View on Instagram |
1/5
My little bird 🥰⁠
⁠
#mommaoftwo #candidmotherhood #themommycodes #losangelesblogger #postpartumjourney
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow
My little bird 🥰⁠ ⁠ #mommaoftwo #candidmotherhood #themommycodes #losangelesblogger #postpartumjourney
3 days ago
View on Instagram |
2/5
I can't look at my rainbow baby ⁠
without thinking of my angel baby. ⁠
⁠
I can't think of my angel baby⁠
without thanking for our rainbow baby. ⁠
⁠
There isn't a world or heaven where a child is replaceable. 💔⁠
⁠
The more I care for Zoë, the more my heart breaks for what happened to my little Blake. Grief of a child is the most awful thing I’ve ever had to go through and that has forever changed me. Holding him, kissing his little nose, birthing him for hours and having to let him go is my biggest heartbreak that keeps on hurting. 

While I get to hold my beautiful rainbow baby, my beautiful miracle, while I observe all of her…her eyes, her nose, life through her expressions and smile…I take it all in but my heart and body can constantly feel the hole of these moments that I’ll never get to have with him. 

To anyone who’s survived such a devastating loss…my heart knows how you feel at night when you close your eyes. My arms are wrapped around you. 

#postpartum #rainbowbaby #themommycodes #grief #letstalkaboutgrief
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow
I can't look at my rainbow baby ⁠ without thinking of my angel baby. ⁠ ⁠ I can't think of my angel baby⁠ without thanking for our rainbow baby. ⁠ ⁠ There isn't a world or heaven where a child is replaceable. 💔⁠ ⁠ The more I care for Zoë, the more my heart breaks for what happened to my little Blake. Grief of a child is the most awful thing I’ve ever had to go through and that has forever changed me. Holding him, kissing his little nose, birthing him for hours and having to let him go is my biggest heartbreak that keeps on hurting. While I get to hold my beautiful rainbow baby, my beautiful miracle, while I observe all of her…her eyes, her nose, life through her expressions and smile…I take it all in but my heart and body can constantly feel the hole of these moments that I’ll never get to have with him. To anyone who’s survived such a devastating loss…my heart knows how you feel at night when you close your eyes. My arms are wrapped around you. #postpartum #rainbowbaby #themommycodes #grief #letstalkaboutgrief
1 week ago
View on Instagram |
3/5
Hello friends! I'm Julie from The Mommy Codes. I introduce “mom life” codes throughout pregnancy and motherhood with a mission to bring more postpartum support, gentle parenting, traveling with children and exploring topics in a multi-cultural way and judgement free to help navigate motherhood as authentically as possible. ⁠
⁠
Thank you for being here and following along on this journey. 🥰⁠
⁠
#themommycodes #candidmotherhood #postpartumjourney #postpartumhealth
juliebarzman
juliebarzman
•
Follow
Hello friends! I'm Julie from The Mommy Codes. I introduce “mom life” codes throughout pregnancy and motherhood with a mission to bring more postpartum support, gentle parenting, traveling with children and exploring topics in a multi-cultural way and judgement free to help navigate motherhood as authentically as possible. ⁠ ⁠ Thank you for being here and following along on this journey. 🥰⁠ ⁠ #themommycodes #candidmotherhood #postpartumjourney #postpartumhealth
2 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
4/5
Shop my must haves! From my preferred car seat option to baby bouncers, I’ve listed my baby must haves for you to shop! Send me a DM on Instagram if you have any follow up questions, I’m always happy to chat about these kinds of things. Link in bio 😘
juliebarzman
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•
Follow
Shop my must haves! From my preferred car seat option to baby bouncers, I’ve listed my baby must haves for you to shop! Send me a DM on Instagram if you have any follow up questions, I’m always happy to chat about these kinds of things. Link in bio 😘
2 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
5/5
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